it's a blessing!

Last week, I had the great privilege to play for morning Mass and a funeral on Tuesday, a funeral on Thursday, morning Mass on Friday, evening Mass on Saturday and 3 masses on Sunday...eight masses in 6 days! It was my heart's delight to be able to do such a thing!

A Sister once told me that I command people to sing at Mass. I joked that I didn't know if that was a compliment or not. We laughed and she said it WAS a compliment, that people in the congregation really sing when I cantor and play. I told her people probably sing in self-defense, hoping to drown out MY singing. However, I was thrilled by her words because it is my goal to entice the congregation to sing praise to God during Mass as a community of joy-filled and faithful people. Of course, this is not without its foibles. I've been known to teach whole congregations to sing hymns wrong (oops!), realizing much later what I'd done. (Is youth or nervousness a good excuse?) It was a good lesson in humility, to be sure!

It is the greatest privilege of my life to be able to honor God through promoting congregational singing at Mass. It took me a long time to stop being nervous about it. While I'm no longer nervous about playing, I do see it as a weighty responsibility. It behooves me to be prepared, to make sure I know the hymns without making noticeable mistakes, to be the best musician I can be so that I do not distract from the prayer. (I have heard bad musicians at Mass and they were a HUGE distraction!) I also do not want to approach my job, thinking I am "performing". I never want a spotlight to be on me during Mass. Everyone's focus must always be on our dear Lord and His Sacrifice, which is re-presented during Mass. I try to always think of myself as a servant--serving God, His people and the Liturgy.

I joke that I want to die right after receiving Holy Communion while I'm playing the Communion hymn. Of course, my resulting fall over the keyboard would create a loud cacophony, which would NOT be conducive to prayerful contemplation on the part of others...It definitely would be something memorable!

I find it interesting that I sort of fell into this work. I didn't start out majoring in music in college. It just naturally happened because of my interest in learning music theory. Despite the mandatory practice schedule of 4 to 8 hours a day while in college, I didn't become a stellar technician but I have always loved to play for Mass. Looking back, I see that working my way through college by playing the organ for 3 masses at an air base chapel was an opportunity to find my way to a lifelong career.

I love how the Holy Spirit inspires our choices in life! As I've gotten older, I look back on my life and marvel at that. God is good!