grandchildren

Whenever I hear that the mother of one of our clients is coercing her daughter to abort her grandchild, I become incredulous. I doubt I will ever understand it. Even when I hear her reasons, I still cannot believe it because what I know to be true is my grandchildren are among God's best gifts (if not THE best gift) to me. They are pure joy--heaven sent, to be sure! Spending time with them causes everything else to fade into the background. It's all about being silly, laughing together, a little bit of spoiling, learning new things together, viewing the world through innocent children's eyes, being fully present in the moment with two precious angel babies. We do lots of things together but it's never really about the things we do. It's about spending time together, enjoying one another, loving one another. The other night, I went over to play with them for a bit before tucking them into bed and my grandson told me he wanted me to be there if he woke up in the night and in the morning. I had to explain that I wouldn't be able to do that but we would plan an overnight together very soon. The next night, my daughter-in-law invited me over for dinner. It warmed my heart to be able to spend so much time with all of them. These times are such treasures!

Before Liam was born, I told my daughter-in-law that I thought I would have to see him at least once a week so I could develop a relationship with him. Without batting an eye, she said, "Of course." I was so thrilled by her response. (Since then, she's told me that I could visit any time I wanted and I could tell she meant it.) I'd been hearing about in-laws not having access to grandchildren and I'd been praying that wouldn't happen to me. I spent the first six weeks of his life with him every day because his mother was recovering from having an emergency c-section and she asked me to help her. I took the 6 AM to noon shift and her mother came in the afternoon until my son got home from work. It was a wondrous time! When Ellie was born 15 months later, we had the same routine. It was such a privilege to be there with them during that time. And, every week since Liam was 6 weeks old, except when they go to their cabin for a week in the summer, we have had a "Nana play date" one morning a week (usually Mondays unless I have to play for a funeral). My, how I look forward to those days!

I have a million funny stories. One day, when Liam was 2, he was helping his mom clean the goldfish bowl. His job was to pour the fish into the clean tank. He missed the bowl and the fish landed, splat, on the counter. He scooped it up and put it in his mouth! He must have decided it wasn't a good thing to eat because he spat it out and his mom picked it up and put it in the water. The poor fish survived...We were all surprised it didn't die of a heart attack!

This morning, we spent the morning at the mall where we saw Santa Claus. (Liam thought he was going to get to pick up the things he'd asked Santa to get him right after he was done sitting on his lap. It's going to be a long Advent for the poor kid!) When we were walking along, I told Liam he was my love bug. He told me he was NOT my love bug. I replied, are you kidding me? You've been my love bug since the day you were born 3 and a half years ago. How can you say that? You'll ALWAYS be my love bug. Then, he laughed. I think he enjoyed getting Nana's goat like that. This was the first time he'd teased me. I love watching his sense of humor emerge. And, Ellie must have 1000 words in her vocabulary. She says everything these days! She's a lot like I am in that she is a student of people. She studies them closely and always seems to know how they are feeling. "Liam sad" she'll say when he's unhappy about something. She's been like this from a very young age. They are both so unique...and very dear to their Nana's heart.

Truly, it is a mystery to me how grandmothers can think it's a good thing to force their daughters to abort their grandchildren...From a purely grandmother perspective, I know they are depriving themselves of something very beautiful and irreplaceable.